HERMAN JUNCTION BOY GOES FLYING: POST #74, APRIL 1, 2010

I never flew much out of Herman Junction as I was growing up there, at least by airplane. Now, when Harvel got behind the wheel of a car you could almost feel it lifting off the ground at times. We had a pretty good air strip with Old, Old, Highway 63 running right through Herman Junction.

But, since I left Herman Junction I have done my share of flying and I still don't like it one bit. A friend told me once, "The Lord said, "LOW I'll be with you always." I think that is right too. However, I have accepted the fact that if I am going to go some of the places that I want to go, I must fly.

I recently made a trip to Romania for about the 50th time. I had some experiences that I must tell you about. Of course, it was on an Air France plane and that is about as bad as it gets for me. I had rather fly on one of the crop dusters in the Herman Junction area as to ride one of their planes. Here is one reason why....

The main meal of the day on that 5,000 plus mile, one way trip was a choice between these two things:

Mixed vegetable salad and poached egg; Lamb meatballs and Semolina, OR, Neapolitan style Cheese tortellini. Then, they added a tiny piece of Camembert Cheese, a Pineapple stick, a tiny piece of what they called Raspberry cake but it wasn't, and rolls hard enough to knock the depot over if you threw one at it.

Most of you know what I thought about that poached egg salad deal. I did eat the pineapple stick, the raspberry supposed to be cake, and one bite of the strange cheese. It was awful. To my surprise I did try the Lamb meatballs. I just closed my eyes, plopped one in my mouth and it really wasn't all that bad so I ate another one or two. But, all that I could think while I was eating it was: "Mary had a little Lamb, it's fleece was white as snow. Now it's all chewed up in a boy from Herman Junction, and it's off to Arkansas he go."

I asked what "Semolina" was and when that French flight attendant answered it sounded to me like she said something about "Goose" and that closed that deal. I would have liked to ask for a baloney sandwich but I knew that would have been talking in tongues to her as much as she was to me.

All of these flying experiences have moved to to do something about it. So, I have submitted my set of rules for flying to the FAA, certain that they will be approved. If you don't like them you can just take the bus or train. They will be in the next blog post.