Thursday, April 1, 2010

TED'S RULES FOR FLYING: POST #75 APRIL 1, 2010

1. Old people cannot fly. They can't find their row and seat assignments nor put their luggage up in the overhead bins, and they have to go to the toilet every three minutes. Kids, take them wherever they need to go or keep them at home
2. Anyone with a neck brace on or an arm in a cast cannot fly unless it is on an Air France plane everywhere they go.
3. All parents with crying babies must be put on the back row behind some kind of sound barrier unless it is one of my Great-Grandchildren, then they can sit with me and Great-Grandma.
4. If I am in an aisle seat and someone just parks right in the aisle with his back to me and his rear end right in my face, they will be thrown out the window.
5. If there is not an exit row or bulk head seat available, I will be automatically upgraded to business class.
6. Those bing-bong sounds that keep going off, especially when I am trying to take a nap, will be disengaged forever!
7. Anyone who even resembles a terrorist will not be on a plane that I am on and I will be the judge of who looks like a terrorist.
8. Old women, ugly girls, and gay guys cannot be flight attendants except on Air France.
9. All meals will be made from recipes from Herman Junction chefs. Cheeseburgers and fries (not FRENCH fries) for lunch; Corn bread and fried potatoes for supper, and Mexico Chiquito cheese dip and chips for a snack.
10. All pilots will be trained by that 'Sully' pilot that landed that plane safely in the Hudson River.
11. Anyone who asks me if the Clinton's are from Arkansas one more time will ride the entire flight on the toilet seat.
12. No alcoholic beverages will be served, especially to Texas Rednecks who keep yelling, "Don't mess with Texas."
13. If I have to sit on a plane more than thirty minutes my money will be refunded.
14, The next gate agent from Paris, France who lies to me will have to move to Red Onion, Arkansas and pick cotton for the rest of their life.
15. Delta Airlines must sever all relations with Air France. Come to think of it, Air France should not be allowed to fly anywhere but in France
16. I will not be served my Sprite anymore in a little cup that is empty after one gulp. Mayonaise jars will replace them immediately!
17. Every plane will have a 'Razorback' emblem on it somewhere and everyone will call the hogs while those attendants make all those safety announcements that you cannot hear and understand anyway.
18. When I am flying home to Arkansas, I am not to be flown OVER Arkansas and then brought back four hours later.
19. Great, Great, big fat people who are eating Cheetos and Reese's peanut butter cups cannot fly at all unless it is on Air France and with their food they will surely lose some weight.
20. Trips to the toilet will be limited to one trip per flight and after that you can use that mayonaise jar that you had left over from drinking your Sprite.
21. Waking me up to crawl over me and get out will result in your being super-glued to your seat the rest of the flight.
22. Any complaints about these rules will be dealt with according to age and size of the complainer.

HERMAN JUNCTION BOY GOES FLYING: POST #74, APRIL 1, 2010

I never flew much out of Herman Junction as I was growing up there, at least by airplane. Now, when Harvel got behind the wheel of a car you could almost feel it lifting off the ground at times. We had a pretty good air strip with Old, Old, Highway 63 running right through Herman Junction.

But, since I left Herman Junction I have done my share of flying and I still don't like it one bit. A friend told me once, "The Lord said, "LOW I'll be with you always." I think that is right too. However, I have accepted the fact that if I am going to go some of the places that I want to go, I must fly.

I recently made a trip to Romania for about the 50th time. I had some experiences that I must tell you about. Of course, it was on an Air France plane and that is about as bad as it gets for me. I had rather fly on one of the crop dusters in the Herman Junction area as to ride one of their planes. Here is one reason why....

The main meal of the day on that 5,000 plus mile, one way trip was a choice between these two things:

Mixed vegetable salad and poached egg; Lamb meatballs and Semolina, OR, Neapolitan style Cheese tortellini. Then, they added a tiny piece of Camembert Cheese, a Pineapple stick, a tiny piece of what they called Raspberry cake but it wasn't, and rolls hard enough to knock the depot over if you threw one at it.

Most of you know what I thought about that poached egg salad deal. I did eat the pineapple stick, the raspberry supposed to be cake, and one bite of the strange cheese. It was awful. To my surprise I did try the Lamb meatballs. I just closed my eyes, plopped one in my mouth and it really wasn't all that bad so I ate another one or two. But, all that I could think while I was eating it was: "Mary had a little Lamb, it's fleece was white as snow. Now it's all chewed up in a boy from Herman Junction, and it's off to Arkansas he go."

I asked what "Semolina" was and when that French flight attendant answered it sounded to me like she said something about "Goose" and that closed that deal. I would have liked to ask for a baloney sandwich but I knew that would have been talking in tongues to her as much as she was to me.

All of these flying experiences have moved to to do something about it. So, I have submitted my set of rules for flying to the FAA, certain that they will be approved. If you don't like them you can just take the bus or train. They will be in the next blog post.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

HERMAN JUNCTION ECONOMICS LESSON:POST #73 FEB. 25, 2010

I never knew a rich family or person monetarily that lived at Herman Junction. Sometimes when we would be working in the fields the land owner might come driving down the road real slow just looking over the crops and I would look at that bright, shiny, new car and the driver with a big cigar in his mouth and think about how lucky he was and how rich he must have been. But, I didn't know any rich people. We were richer than we realized, just not in money.

But, my Dad and a lot of other people in Herman Junction knew a lot more about handling finances than a lot of rich and powerful people do today, especially those in Washington who are supposed to know about such things. I never heard of anyone going bankrupt. I didn't even know what that meant until years later. I believe that I learned something from the Herman Junction folks about the economy that I wish our 'guvment' leaders today would learn. And, the American people would be much better off if they would learn this lesson to. Want to know what it is? Here it comes....

"IF YOU DON'T HAVE MONEY TO SPEND, DON'T SPEND!"
If my Dad didn't have the money for something that we wanted or thought that we needed, he didn't hesitate to say, "We don't have the money." We made other arrangements without an argument because we knew that was the end of that conversation. If Mom wanted new curtains, a washing machine, running water in the house and a bathroom, that was fine but it didn't come until there was money to pay for it. If we kids wanted skates, a bicycle, new basketball, or whatever, we didn't get it until there was money to pay for it. I needed some Converse athletic shoes for basketball one time but Dad didn't have the money so older brother Harvel bought me some. He just didn't spend money when he didn't have money to spend. A few months before Dad died he told me, "I want to leave this earth not owing anyone a dime" and he did it. That is quite an accomplishment for a guy with a fourth grade education who was just yanked up by the hair of the head, and the seat of his britches but worked really, really, hard and didn't spend money that he didn't have.
Is there anything in there that you cannot understand? Isn't it simple? Today our leaders continue to spend, spend, spend, and the hole just gets deeper, deeper, and deeper because they don't have the money to spend but they keep on spending. Some families are doing the same thing. Why are there so many mortgage foreclosures, cars repossessed, and savings depleted? People are spending what they don't have to spend! Government is spending what it doesn't have to spend! Yes, I know that some people have unexpectedly lost their jobs or medical expenses or some other catastrophe has wiped them out, but in MOST cases spending what we didn't have to spend has led us down a path to heartache.
If I could give some families some economic advice today it would be simply this: "If you don't have the money to go out and eat, EAT AT HOME! If you don't have the money to go to the movies, STAY HOME and play with the kids or read a book! If you don't have the money to trade cars, DRIVE THE OLD ONE! If you don't have the money for a new suit or dress, PATCH up your old ones for awhile! If you don't have the money to pay for that dumb cell phone with all the text message system, GPS system, TV, Camera, Music, go to Wal-Mart and buy a 'Go Phone' for $19.95 and just settle for a CELL PHONE! If you can't pay for a new TV, listen to the radio until you can buy a new one and pay for it. Throw out the credit cards, burn up the ATM cards and debit cards, and don't even think about charging something! If you don't have money to spend, DON'T SPEND!
After all, look at the expert who is writing this!! Well, I know that I don't have enough money to pay attention, but I have a 1973 Monte Carlo and a 1996 Grand Marquis, both paid for and I ain't spending money that I don't have to keep up with people that I don't even like. So, hear it one more time....
"IF YOU DON'T HAVE MONEY TO SPEND, DON'T SPEND!!

Monday, February 22, 2010

THE HOLY GUM SLOUGH DITCH: POST #72: FEB. 22, 2010

Every year there was at least one evangelistic gospel meeting ( some call them revivals) held at the church of Christ in Bay, Arkansas where we attended church services. These gospel meetings sometimes lasted two weeks and if the weather got too hot they would move the pews outside and string up some lights and conduct services under the stars. Herbert and Dessie Knight never missed one service of these meetings unless there was some very serious conflict like sickness or something. We walked to the meeting many nights after Dad had worked on the railroad all day and the others worked in the fields. However, the meeting usually was scheduled after the crops were 'laid by', so it was a little easier. After services we would walk back home until Dad got a car and then of course we would ride and that was much better. I remember the gospel meetings so well and remember many of the preachers who came to preach.

When gospel meetings were conducted it was not unusual to have several people respond to the invitation to be baptized. There was no baptistery in the early days. So, many times it would be several days before the baptisms were done. Then, everyone would meet at the Gum Slough Ditch and all be baptized at the same time. I remember when 46 people were baptized there in one meeting in which the preachers name was V.E. Howard. Until the church had a baptistery installed, the Gum Slough Ditch was the official baptizing place for the church of Christ.

I got to thinking about that one day. I thought that the Gum Slough must have been either the most righteous ditch in the country or the dirtiest ditch one could find. If all those sins were washed off right there in the ditch it would surely muddy it up bad. But, I don't think that was the case. I think that those sins were washed away in the blood of Jesus and that Gum Slough ditch must have been the most holy body of water in the entire county. I guess that is why the old swimming hole on down the ditch a little ways was so suitable for a swim. The swimming hole was called, "The Forks".

We got a baptistery later and then baptisms took place in the building. I think that I mentioned this earlier but when it was put in someone must have misplaced the drain stopper and it was replaced by a Dr. Pepper. Sometimes some ugly-minded guy would get in there and grab the Dr. Pepper and the next service the baptistery was dry. All of that is fixed now and I'm glad.

But, I still wonder about the condition of the old Gum Slough Ditch? A Herman Junction Boy Can figure for some time on a deal like that.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

SPORTSMANSHIP AT HERMAN JUNCTION: POST #71, FEB. 21, 2010

Growing up at Herman Junction was exciting and we never found ourselves with nothing to do. I don't remember anyone talking about being bored or complaining because there wasn't anything to do. We made things to do. We had more games than you can imagine that youngsters today would think were stupid, but they weren't stupid to us.

Most of the things that we did involved competition. We wanted to see who could win. Every one that I knew would expend every effort to win whatever we were competing in. Second place finishers were losers. When one would climb up on the concrete storm cellar and proclaim himself 'King Of The Hill' he gave everything that he had to keep from being knocked off there by the others. When roller skating on the old highway, every person was determined to be the fastest, most stable, and creative skater there was. If you lost in any event it broke your heart and drove you to do better the next time.

When I observe some of the things today in sports I am surprised at how people feel about winning and losing and their attitudes toward their opponents. At high school basketball games when the players are introduced they run to the other end and shake hands with the opposing coach. After the game they all line up and shake hands or give hugs to each other and extend congratulations to one another. Can you imagine me running up to one of those Herman Junction boys and wishing him luck in opposing me in some contest? Or, can you imagine one of them coming to me after the contest is over and congratulating me for beating him? It ain't never gonna happen!

No, Sir that would not have happened at Herman Junction among the Knight boys or any of the others who came to our house. If an opposing player came over to shake hands before the game and say, "Good Luck", he would have been considered to be out of his mind. If I were a Coach today and some opposing kids came running down to shake my hand I think that I would tell him to get back to the other end because my team was about to whip his team from end to end. And, when that game was over and I had lost, don't come running down there to tell me how good a game we played and offer congratulations! We just got beat! Get out of here before I melt and pour all over you! I see these Tennis players work for several matches and then when the game is over they meet at the net and hug each other, etc. Not me! If I met him at the net I would hit him in the head with my racket! He just beat me and that is not acceptable to me. Old Peyton Manning walked off the field after losing the 2010 Super Bowl and people got all over him for not being a good sport. Phooey! He just lost the biggest game of the year. Let him go off and work it out in his own mind and then maybe later he can tell the victors how good they played.

Sportsmanship. Well, it is good but only to a degree. Give me time because the Herman Junction in me isn't all gone yet so leave me alone before the game because I am going to try to beat you as much as I can. And, when that game is over, stay away from me. I ain't going to congratulate nobody for whupping me!!

Sunday, February 7, 2010

LEVY CALLS: POST #70 FEB. 7, 2010

We were so happy at Swifton and Barbara thought that we would stay there until we retired or died. The new house that we had just moved into was such a beautiful house, especially for that time. It was so big that we could not even afford to furnish it completely and had conveniences that we had never had before. The church was strong and they loved us and showed that love in so many, many, ways. No preacher had things better than I did. I had landed in a tub of butter for sure.

One night Barbara was ironing and I was sitting watching her iron and we were just making conversation. The phone rang. I said, "I will get this in the bedroom, it's some big church calling for me to come preach for them." I picked up the receiver and said, "Hello", and on the other end I heard these words: "Brother Knight, this is Ted Sorrells from the Levy church of Christ in North Little Rock, Arkansas." We exchanged our greetings and then he continued, "Our preacher is moving and we are looking for a preacher. We wondered if you might be interested in talking with us about this."

I was almost completely speechless! I had never heard of the Levy church of Christ and had only been to Little Rock two or three times in my life. I was stunned. I simply asked if I could have a little time and talk to My Lady and if he could call later that would be good for me. He said that he would. You cannot imagine how big a lie My Lady thought that I was making up when I went back in the other room and told her about that call. It took some time before she really believed what I was telling her. We were both just completely overwhelmed at this moment in our life together.

On May 15, 1966 three of the elders at Levy came to visit our Sunday evening services and we met at our house after services. The news was out at Swifton because one of the elders at Levy had a nephew who worshipped at Swifton and that nephew knew immediately why they were there. We agreed to come to Levy and 'try out' which I hated, so we went there on June 4th and spent the night at the Holiday Inn. Marty wanted a Holiday Inn in his back yard at Swifton because he really thought that we were walking in high cotton. On June 5, 1966 I preached my first sermon at Levy and fell in love with that church. We ate lunch with Ted & Edith Sorrells and had a great time. The next day we ate with L.T. & Dorothea Blevins, one of the elders and he told me that in the elders meeting later that evening they were going to invite us to move there and work with the church. Again, I was completely floored.

I went back home and told the elders at Swifton that we were going to move in three months. They were shocked too and began to encourage us to change our mind. In fact, they were so persuasive that I told them that I would stay at Swifton. On July 20th I went back to Levy to tell the elders that we would not be moving there. It was Wednesday night and they asked me to give the devotional and extend the invitation. When I got up there I knew that I could not back out, so we went back to Swifton and backed out on them.

On August 29th they packed our meager belongings and moved us to 112 Farmere Circle, North Little Rock, Arkansas. I preached my first sermon as the regular preacher with the Levy church of Christ on September 4, 1966. What an exciting life we were beginning and I was in such a whirlwind that I didn't even notice it.

I knew one thing for sure though...I was a long way from Herman Junction and I just had a hard time understanding all this.

Friday, January 15, 2010

SWIFTON, ARK.# TWO: POST #69: JAN. 15, 2010

We arrived in Swifton on June 10, 1963, tired, hot, hungry, and about as ragged as three people can be. When we got there the folks from church had unloaded our meager amount of household belongings and put them in the place that they thought we might want them. Loyd Hulett and Henry Webb had brought a big truck to Manila to get our things. We had a small 5,000 BTU air conditioner and they had put it in our bedroom and that was just great. We could make it alright in the rest of the house but at night we really needed that AC in our room so we could sleep better. Every time someone would come to visit when it was really hot, we took off to the bedroom and just piled up to visit because that was the only cool place. Later, we were able to buy an 18,000 BTU unit and installed it in the living room and we thought that we had really moved up town.

The wonderful people of the whole town of Swifton could not have been better to us. I am going to mention some names and I will miss someone for sure, but I certainly do not mean to slight anyone. From the very beginning, the elders of the church were so supportive and encouraging. Ira Hulen, Henry Webb. W.O. Hulett, Sr., Homer Smith, and C.G. Holt were the elders and we loved them and their wives so very much. I just cannot adequately describe how they shepherded us and were so patient and kind. I could write a book about each one of those couples.

There were a lot of people that I admired who did not attend the services of the church of Christ in Swifton. I am not just 'name dropping' when I say that we loved and admired George and Charlene Kell. George was a great professional baseball player who had just retired and began his career as broadcaster for the Detroit Tigers. We watched him play one time in an Old-Timers game at Yankee stadium in New York on a Saturday and on Monday morning he woke us up to sell us a new car. When My Lady was expecting our baby girl, Charlene Kell hosted a baby shower for her and every person in Swifton was invited. What a shower that was! We bought two new cars from George and just paid him each month whatever amount we could afford. He was a STAR in many, many, other areas than baseball and only the people from Swifton knew it.

I hung out a lot at Buck Hulen's grocery store and Ray McNutt's Gulf service station. I made more contacts with the people of Swifton at those two places than probably anywhere else. I met characters like Burrhead Russell, Claude Mitts, Junior Templeton, Alfred Moon, and many others and listened as they told stories of the past in the Swifton area. I don't know if half of them were true or not, but they sounded good.

Stan and Oneida Chapman became two of our dearest friends and they owned the theater in Swifton. That was quite a popular place in those days. We could go to the show any time we wanted to by just walking in and taking our seats. We didn't go much but a few times we enjoyed seeing a good movie. It was a real treat to eat at Lola Thompson's Cafe over on Highway 67. Lola fed us so well when we would go in, especially on Sundays after Bible study and worship.

I often went to O'Bannion's grocery store and just sit and visit with Walter and Beulah O'Bannion who owned the store and attended services at the church there. It was there that I met a candy salesman named J.B. Milligan. J.B. sold candy and also was a gospel preacher. We would sit and visit and eat Baby Ruth candy bars so long that sometimes he didn't have time to finish his route and he would just go home and finish it later. Baby Ruth candy bars then were what they call 'Family size' now but J.B. and I could eat one each without any problem at all. It was from those visits that J.B. decided to devote his life to preaching the gospel full time and at the age of 88 he is still preaching near Batesville, Ark.

Places and events like these reminded me so much of being at Herman Junction and Bay, Ark. They were the same kind of people and maybe that is why we loved them so much. Ah, Herman Junction and Swifton, how we loved you.

SWIFTON, HERE WE COME: POST#68, JAN.15, 2010

When we decided to leave Manila, Arkansas after two years, I first decided that I would quit preaching. I just thought that there must be a better way of life. I went to Jonesboro to talk to my brother, Ray and he would not help me find another job. He wanted me to preach. I went to my old friend, Floyd Winningham and talked to him about a job in his business or about him helping me find a job. Floyd said, "I would never help a preacher quit preaching!" He gave me some really good advice and we decided to continue our life in preaching the gospel. So, I began looking around and setting up times to "TRY-OUT" (I sure didn't like that term and still don't.")

Someone told me about the church at Swifton, Arkansas looking for a preacher. I didn't know one thing about the church there, but I made an appointment to go there to preach on a Wednesday night in May 1963. We rolled into town with a flat tire and three of the poorest looking characters in the country. I went to Lewis Hudgeons Texaco station to get the tire fixed and then we went on to church services. I don't remember much about that night except the sermon that I preached and it was probably about as flat as the tire was. However, they greeted us like we were really something and the next day they called and invited us to move there. I accepted the offer and began making plans to move in about 30 days.

Then, a preacher that lived close by told me that the Swifton church just fought all the time. That was one thing that we didn't need. I drove over to Swifton and met with the elders and told them what I had heard. Ira (Buck) Hulen said, "We don't have enough energy to fight" and they assured me that they had no desire to have anything but peace and unity. The first Sunday that I preached there I told the entire church about what I had heard, and that if they wanted to fight they would have to give us time to get into fighting shape because we had been through some hard times the previous two years. I will say right now that the 3 1/2 years that we lived at Swifton were some of the greatest years of our life, even until right now.

We had been in the house for about two days and a man knocked on the door. When I answered, he pushed me aside and walked through every room of that house and came back through and walked out and never said one word! I was in shock. What had I moved My Lady and Son into? I thought that the elders had lied and had sent a guy to whip us before I had even preached my first sermon as the local preacher. But, in a few minutes to same man came back, carrying a cold watermelon, introduced himself and we sat down and ate watermelon and had a great visit. The man's name was Bill Wheeler, Sr. He and Vesta his wife and thier family became very, very, dear to us. He was one of the most outstanding Christian men that I have ever known and taught me lesson after lesson about living for the Lord. I could write a book about Bill Wheeler. How we loved them! I could not possibly write in one blog post all the people at Swifton and what they meant to our lives.

It was at Swifton that our KATHY DEANN KNIGHT was born on February 16, 1966. When she was born at 2:30 in the morning I was so excited that I ran down the hall and woke up Oneida Chapman who was a patient there and told her about our baby girl. Then, I went to Tuckerman and stopped and called Ewell and Eloise Webb and told them that our Kathy had just arrived. Ewell could have shot me for waking him up that early but he was gracious. Our Kathy was named after their daughter, Kathy. So now we had a Son and a Daughter and Barbara thought that we were the only couple in the world with a child of each sex.

Life sure was good and we were still only about 40 miles from Herman Junction and could go there often and visit.

Friday, January 8, 2010

BACK AGAIN: POST #67

It has been some months since I wrote and I have been quite neglectful. I could also say that I have been very busy and that would be true. However, I have found that we can make time to do what we really want to do.

I stopped the journey from Herman Junction with POST #65 and inserted one concerning a trip that My Lady and I made in July 2009 to Hot Springs. I was just so 'inspired' when I got home from there that I could not restrain myself from writing about that trip. Now, I will go back to the time when were on our journey in the early days of our married life.

On February 1, 1960 we left the church at Michigan City, Indiana and moved a few miles away to work with the church of Christ at Laporte, Indiana. The church there had elders to oversee the work and I really needed the guidance and leadership of a good Eldership. There were three elders in the beginning....Leo Bailey, Ernie Bush, and Collie Owens. Brother Owens resigned shortly after our arrival there and began worshipping in Michigan City where he and his family lived. I worked the entire time that we lived there under the oversight of Brothers Bush and Bailey and I will always be thankful for the great work that they did and the wonderful influence that they had on our lives.

The entire congregation at Laporte was was wonderful to us. When we moved into a small house at 707 Division Street, there was one house between us and Bryan and June Butts. They were from Arkansas and they were as happy to meet us as we were to meet them. We developed a friendship that lasted as long as they lived and we loved them dearly. I spoke at both of their funeral services. We also became dear friends to their children and grandchildren. It is sad for us that today all of their children have also passed away but we cherish the memories of the great life that we had with them. We still go back to Laporte from time to time to visit those who are still living from years ago and to enjoy a wonderful relationship with the church.

In July 1961 we moved from Laporte to Holland, Missouri. We had such a hard time there that I do not even like to think about it. Yes, there were some good people that we learned to love but it was while we lived at Holland that Johnny (Pete) Earls, the youngest brother of My Lady got sick and passed away. It was such a sad and difficult time for us.

Do you know how that sometimes we jump out of the frying pan into the fire? We did that when we moved from Holland, Mo. to Manila, Ark. We wanted so much to leave Missouri and when we were offered the opportunity to move to Manila we accepted it and moved there. But, it was a sad mistake. The best thing that happened while we lived there was the birth of our son, Martin Andrew Knight on My Lady's 21st birthday, September 17, 1962. What a great joy and one that made a lot of bad things kind of disappear.

Marty got his name from my mother's maiden name and a dear friend, Andrew Simpson of Buchanan, Michigan. We had met and fallen in love with Andrew and Mary Simpson while we lived in Indiana. It was about one week before Marty was born that Andrew died and I was afraid to leave My Lady and go to the funeral at Dover, Arkansas. Marty has blessed our lives more than he will ever know.

In June, 1963 we moved on again and life began to be better than the last two years had been. I will tell you about that next.